I can't get over the fact that most people think I'm overreacting when I'm talking about that guy that has taken advantage of me. they don't say it, but I feel it. "but if you're drunk and you don't know if you said no anymore.. than it's not actually rape-rape. is it :(:(?" and then when I talk about it I'm all like.. "no no ofcourse. I wouldn't know cause I was drunk and probably drugged up, but I think I said no, I have a vague memory of myself not wanting to.. but it's all a blur for me." but the things it has done to me after it happened. I've never hated myself more than this. I act like it's cool.. cause what the fuck.. I don't even actually remember.. so it's not like it's a bad childhoodmemory of being abused and raped etc... but I still can't cope with these feelings. urgh.